Skip to main content

Ten things I love about Kemcolians...

Ten things I love about Kemcolians:
by Sidrah Latif (4th Year)

     1. Amazing sense of direction: When standing infront of Ghari ward they ask “Baji where is medicine ward!” When infront of Pathology they demand where is pathology lab. When infront of Facility area they demand to know where can they get a printing facility. And most importantly they are confused which one is the zero point and which one its anti. Such sweet, loveable simplicity, like that of an old-age Hippo trying to remember what it used to be a part of Shakespearean tango.

     2. Risqué sense of humor: Since Kemcolians take pride in being Kemcolians, somehow they need to communicate it to the outer world that they are the protagonist of the show, crème-de-la-crème of the nation. And what method they choose it to flaunt? Of all the possibilities, ribald sense of humor. Infact I want to open up thesaurus right now to draft up a whole list of vocabulary to give them a topon ki salami! So here goes… Lascivious, licentious, prurient, indecorous, smutty, salacious. Need I say more? *straightens the collar totally smitten with her high intellect*

     3. Steel will and iron determination: Kemcolians are steel-willed and determined like an iron rod! They got their preliminary schooling at Ittefaq Foundary. If they will, teacher can teach them, if they won’t, teacher can not. One dictum that is prevalent without question!

     4. Stand their ground against pigeons: since times immemorial, Pigeons and Kemcolians have co-existed, albeit with mutual animosity that is reciprocated equally on either sides, for years and years. Neither of them is about to give up. In advancement of their struggle against pigeons, kemcolians introduce their own “Pigeony theory of equal effectual representation”. Now they are found littering the campus with their own litter as much the pigeon is utilizing its poop. Way to go buddies, woo-hoo!

     5. Are absurdly rose-eyed: when on campus the dialogues are like:
“yaaar kidhar phans gae hain!”
“hey yar have you heard the package at BNU and LUMS? It comes with girls with skinny jeans and T-SHIRTS! Not long frocks!”
“I wish I were in one of *those* institutions.”
When at home:
“O baita I hear you are in KE now” (Amma’s colleague)
“Yes I am”
“I heard KE’s standard really low now. Why did you go there?”
Moral of the story, no one messes around with our KE except we :D

     6. Have GIT like dinosaurs: “Lakkar-hazam, Pathar-hazam”! Heard about it anyone? Who can eat a bun-makhan-shami of Al-karim daily, top it with main course of vegetable patties, gulp it all down with lemonade and then take a gola for dessert. Kemcolians are the line of evolution who have retained the GIT from dino ancestors. Lakkar-hazam, Pathar-hazam!

     7. Have megaphones for larynx: No matter how hard it is tried to discern, but the structure of Kemcolians’ voice box is yet a myth. Research has been done on khotay ka Larynx and structural homologies have been found between the two larynxes, but yet some structures are even not possessed by khotas’, but Kemcolians’ do have! Physicist have now been called in on the pretext that megaphones may have something to do with their unnaturally loud voices. Research continues, and is a point of active dissention.

     8. Sense of Humor, aaalaa! Yes Kemcolians laugh, and a mighty laugh that is. The statement has been issued by me in order to apprise any non-kemcolian reading this, for we know about ourselves quite too much! Imagine this scenario: “A professor who is a DR. JEKYLL in the class but becomes MR. HYDE in the viva is telling an anecdote he loves to recollect in every session that passes. Just as he is about to throw his punch line expecting tumultuous cheers, someone from the class will take the words out of his mouth, give them their own idea of humorous and throw it to the humor-starved-vultures of the class. Voila! Tumultuous square cheers are received!”
Not worrying about the utterly high risk predicament they are putting themselves in, they show their phenomenal and spectacular sense of humor. They are not afraid of it, and I absolutely love that about them.

     9. Speed, agility, said again SPEED! Ever seen a kemcolian scribbling away in an exam? Think that is the ultimate rendition of their speed and agility, then sweetness you have seen nothing! See them when typing utterly stupid comments on friends’ status updates and photos. The speed has been purportedly reported to exceed 150 WPM! Woo-hoo!

     10. Rumorification: Kemcolians love to talk and spread and talk and spread, and no where in the procedure comes the point of confirmation. Heard that a mouse has a baby kitten, immediately text it to the entire class. There is a walnut shaped, mushy thing lying inside your cranium, heck ever used that? Who cares!
And ten things that I hate (as if my hating will create any difference to the perpetrators of these grievous crimes but let me shoot away. Something about speaking in the face of adversary, I am *sniff* so brave! *Bawls*)


  1. Commendable wit, some parts especially the homolgy with khota larynx made me laugh out loud!
    Great work, a capturing piece indeed

  2. glad you liked it :)

  3. Hilarious! xD
    I think I've now collected arguments to punch in the faces of *KE-kiun-jana-hai* wale loog! :P


Post a Comment

Your feedback is appreciated!

Here's more you should read...

USMLE Step 1 Experience by Ayaz Mehmood (Score : 99/266)

USMLE Step 1 Experience by Ayaz Mehmood (Score : 99/266)
Salam everyone, let me start in the name of Allah who’s the greatest benefactor of all mankind. I am going to write a detailed composition regarding preparation for USMLE Step 1. I am a final year student at King Edward Medical University and I took my exam on June 10th. Final year is the year before internship/ house job in Pakistan. I just got my scores: 99/266

Let me introduce some myths surrounding USMLE Step 1 which are especially prevalent within Pakistan; I am not too sure about India because I heard their students typically appear in their final years.

 Myth number 1:Do not appear for USMLE Step 1 within your graduation

 Verdict: Baseless, illogical reasoning

Explanation: This is so prevalent in Pakistan it’s almost pathetic. One of the biggest concerns surrounding our students is that Step 1 is a huge risk to be taken before graduation. Let me put it in another way: Step1 would always remain a risk whenever it is taken, …

Australian Medical Council AMC Part 1 Guide - Experience and Tips

AMC Part 1 by Dr. Asad Khizar Malik (Rank : 77/620) Australian Medical Council  Guide - Experience and Tips
Salam people, let me start in the name of Allah who’s the greatest benefactor of all mankind. Hope everyone is doing great. I'll try to write as much as I can for the people who are due to various reasons more interested in joining Australian Hospitals for post-grad training as compared to the USMLE pathway.

I am a graduate of King Edward Medical University, class of 2004-2010. I did my 6 months house job after graduation in Mayo Hospital, and after that, i gave my AMC Part 1 in November, 2010 from Brisbane. With the grace of Allah, I passed that in first attempt.


First thing in mind that comes with post grad training in Pakistani doctors minds is: Which way to go after graduation? That is a very tough decision that is …

FSc Premedical Guide - How to fly high..

FSc Premedical Guide - How to fly high.. Unsa Athar Your 40% needs to be excellent to get into KEMU or  some other good place.
(Dedicated to my teachers who not only taught me the fsc books but also many priceless lessons of life)
(Unsa Athar)
The tree that never had to fight For sun and sky and air and light, But stood out in the open rain And always got its share and rain, Never became a forest king, But lived and died a scrubby thing… Good timber does not grow with ease, The stronger wind, the stronger trees.
Getting yourself educated in the desi manner i.e. through the Board of Intermediate and Secondary Education is one of the top most challenges of today’s society. Matriculation seems difficult at that time, but when you enter FSc, you realize that matric was the easiest job in the world.  Those obese books of intermediate part I and part II are the worst enemies one can ever have.  People say Medical is tougher, but I find one basic difference in both. When you enter a medical college, y…


Anatomy/Histology Gallery
Read the instructions here 1st Year

Histology Slides for Professional Exams
Folder 1- Labelled Folder 2 - Labelled Folder 3 - Labelled
Histology Revision Slides Updated (2011)
by Laiba Khalid
Lower Limb Anatomy Spotting Labelled

Embryology Models Some models are labelled and others mentioned in comments

Anatomy Museum Models (unlabelled) This album covers Upper limb, Lower limb and Thorax regions of anatomy

2nd Year
HISTOLOGY Diagrams Hand-drawn CARDS 2ND YEAR MBBSThese are hand-drawn histology diagrams by Demonstrator Dr. Shaista (Dept of Anatomy, KEMU) and submitted by Anosha.NEUROLOGY/ Neuroantomy SPOTTING  (LABELLED SPECIMEN) 2ND YEAR  Each structure is labelled and a great job done by Anosha. Neuroanatomy / Brain 2nd Year Important topics by LaibaNeuroanatomy Models Labelled  Gross models labelled by Maryam Shahid Abdomen & Pelvis Anatomy Spots Labelled Excellent job by Maryam Shahid
Anatomy Learni…

USMLE Step 2 CK experience by Rizwan Khan (254)


     I recently got done with Step 2 CK exam & I want to elaborate my experience and the mistakes that I made during my prep so that any of my colleagues who are preparing for this exam might benefit from them. I wont go much in detail about how to prepare and where to prepare from since it is already highly debated on the forum and in the previous posts but would focus more on my personal experience and the bad choices which I made during the preparation phase.
SELF-ASSESSMENTS AND QBANKS Uworld 74% Kaplan Qbank 69%
Kaplan diagnostics  = 80% (70 days before exam) Kaplan Simulation Exam 1 = 71% (50 days before exam) Kaplan Simulation Exam 2 = 76%  (40 days before exam) Fred simulation for CK = 84% (39 days before exam) NBME 2 (offline) 21 mistakes (30 days before exam)
NBME 4  =    263 (13 days before exam) UWSA =  259 (2 days before exam)
Real exam = 254