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Behind the Curtains with The Anwar Kala - An Interview with the guy whose tales were told!


Behind the Curtains

With The Anwar Kaala


Interview by: Usama Pasha, M.Bilal, Sadaf Hafeez, Moeed Ahmed, Taroob Latef, Laiba Khalid and M.Salik

Written by: Taroob Latef and Moeed Ahmed





                The Legend that still lives in DH


The man who is the Pioneer of the words "Daak saab! Chaa Paani!"

Not so happy after retiring from a 32 year long tenure and having recently applied for a return, Anwar Kaala idolizes Professor Tahira (ex-anatomy HOD), laughs every time we mention Ma’am Attiya and is relieved to have married all his children in time.




Kemunited recently caught up with Anwar Kaala spotted sitting outside the Piccadily Café in a hot pink hoodie that was hard to miss. Spotted by Usama Pasha and cornered by Muhammad Bilal, many of us saw and met Anwar Kaala for the first time. While sharing our pizzas with him, we took a very spontaneous 15 min interview. His simplicity kept us smiling throughout.



Note: The interview is mostly in urdu and his answers in punjabi to keep the spirit of the interview just as it was taken.

KE yaad ata hai?
Han. Saara kuch yaad ata hai. Har cheez da mainu pata hai. Hun maine fir darkhaast diti. Maine kaha mainu rakho. Madam nai na maandi pai.

Retired life behtar hai ya pehle behtar tha?
Jo maza pehle tha wo ab nai. Retire ho k tou banda bore ho janda hai.

Aap aur ap ki biwi kaise milay thay? Shaadi  kaise hui?
He didn’t really get our meaning =P and replied with a little surprise, “Ami abu ne karai thi. Hor kisne karwani si?”

Bachay kitnay hain?
3 kuryan, 2 munday, sab de shaadi kara deti hui. Hun mein farigh. (He grinned, all teeth out at this).

Ap KE kaise aye?
Aik dost the mera, unhey puchaya ‘duty te lagwa dye?’ meine kaha lagwa do.

KE anay se pehlay kya kertay thay?
Sabzi bechta tha, mandi mein.

Who was the Anatomy HOD when you began your job?
Prof. Tuqaya aur phir Prof. Attya.

Madam tahira ki koi baat yaad hai?                        
Nai wo bohat achay banday si. Bara khayal rakhday si. Kapray waighera har cheez deti si.

Madam Attiya ki koi khaas baat?
(He laughed) Nai, nai (and laughs again) Nai! (Still laughing).

"Jb tussi bhe hun sannu khan peen nu deo ge 
tu asi yaad nai karaan ge. Assi te kahwan
ge filanay nu Khuda tarqqi deway.
 Ae he gal hondi hai na."

Chai paani ki kya story hai?
Lo jee. (And henceforth he couldn’t stop laughing) Bus doctor sahib.

Kitnay ban jatay thay din mein? Kitnay students pila detay thay aur kitnay mana kar detay thay?
Bus aise he tha. Pehlay changa waqt si. Koi wee de deta si, koi dus koi tee.

We coaxed again, this time in Punjabi hoping it would press the trigger button: Fir wee kinnay ban janday si din mein?
(He almost cackled now). Bus doctor sahib shukar Allah ka k saada guzara ho gaya. Changay waqt chay retire hogaye.
Alas =P



College ki kaunsi cheez sab se zyada yaad ati hai?
Sab kuch he yaad aanda hai. Yahan di har cheez da menu pata hai. Bachay wee yad anday. (He was honest) Jb tussi bhe hun sannu khan peen nu deo ge tu asi yaad nai karaan ge.  Assi te kahwan ge filanay nu Khuda tarqqi deway. Ae he gal hondi hai na.

"Doctor saab banda fikar faaka na na karay,
tension na na laway, te banda jawaan hai.
Assi parhayan walay nu changay hain."

Tankha kitni thi?
Saday baara hazaar.

Jub shuru mein aye thay tab kitni the?
Do tin hazaar. Audhon inni tankha wi bohat si.

Umer kitni hogayi?
64. Hali wi shukar hai kyu ki kai saray munday saaday naal mar gaye.

Hallay wi tussi jawan he lagday o? Razz ki hai jawani ka? =P
Sehat meri sai hi hai. Mery naal de baray log budhay hogaye.

He leant forward and shushed evrery one talking and pouring questions: Doctor saab banda fikar faaka na na karay, tension na na laway, te banda jawaan hai. Nai te Buddha.  Ae je tahda parhai da kaam hai na bara aukha hai, parhai aiwien te nai na mil jandi. Te tussi tension lenday ho tu kam tamam ho janda.
 (Touche doctors =D)

Ap tu shukar kartay hunge k parhna nai para?
Assi parhayan walay nu changay hain. Kuch we nai parha fir wee har cheez da menun pata hai.

Bachay kia kaam kar rai?
Rickshay chalanday hain. Dono. Hun unna de bachay parhday hain.

"Shuru shuru mae dar lagta tha. Fir mein DH
mae raat nun akaila pai jaanda tha. Ghar mae
 begum poochti thi, “Taanu dar ni lagda?”
Mein kehnda si dar kis cheez da!"

Pakistan mein kahan kahan phiray hain?
Bus duty tun ghar. Te ghar se duty. 

Rehtay kahan hain ap?
Larkiun de hostel de nall jo bachiayan da school hai, naal he saada ghar hai.

 Favourite movie and actor?
Kaala was too shy to answer and replied with laughter , “Na karo doctor sahab. Asi budhayan ne ki film daikhni.”

Kabhi koi galat kaam kartay huay pakray gaye?
The simplest answer: Assi kaddi kitta he nai.

 Kabhi aap ne DH mein bhoot daikha ya kabhi dar laga?
Kabhi nai. Shuru shuru mae dar lagta tha. Fir mein DH mae raat nun akaila pai jaanda tha. Ghar mae begum poochti thi, “Taanu dar ni lagda?” Mein kehnda si darr kis cheez da.

"Audhon bhe bachay inna he parhday si,
hun balkay bohtay parhday."


Time to take some technical input from Kaala:-

Exam ki tyari k liye bones lena pehle asaan tha ya ab asaan hai?
Kaala was hesitant to answer and criticized the recent act of his successor, Yousaf Kaala.

 KE is better as college or university?
University (a prompt reply. Kaala is ready to accept university status of KE despite of all the criticism.)

Students me koi fark aya hai? Parhai mein?
Audhon bhe bachay inna he parhday si, hun balkay bohtay parhday.

College apkay waqt behtar tha ya ab behtar hai?
Ab behtar hai. Baray kaam ho gaye hain.

Comments

  1. wow.. amazing.. the way an illerate person can say so deep things..

    ReplyDelete
  2. So finally! Yay! Loved every word of it! Keep up the good work guys! :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. Wah. Dil k arman poore kar diye par aik kasak abhi b baqi hai. Kitna ban jata ho ga akhir aik din men? :p

    ReplyDelete

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