Skip to main content

MODULE IS COMING.


By: Romesa Qaiser Khan, 1st year.


Module is such an intriguing word. It has an aura of mystery, a charisma; it is an enigma that begs to be resolved by those who haven’t experienced it themselves firsthand.



other people everytime someone says "module" 

And here to shatter all these illusions is a little preview of what module system is actually like.


  • ·        Snoozefests- It is a universally known fact that any student, when locked in a darkened room with no profess-ional supervision, will fall asleep. Modules in fact humanely serve this purpose of letting students rest up after the tiring, demanding workload of the intermodullary block. The first row students are seen gently swaying like reeds in the wind and chaos gradually descends with increasing height of rows until the last benchers can be heard snoring before they are sighted stretched out on 3-4chairs in the anatomical position with an arm dangling here, a chappal lying there. Indeed the world has seen none equal to these sleeping beauties except perhaps on buses from Peshawar to Lahore.

  • what backbenchers do.
what front benchers do.

  • Proxies, Proxies everywhere- What is sole reason that drives a medical student to day after day of grueling hardwork and grinding routine? Why, attendance of course (service to humanity is a close second). Module lectures can put the infamous Double Shah to shame as the number of students present multiplies by fours and eights in direct proportion to the number of times the attendance sheet is circulated in the hall. Module lectures are so high in demand that even the neighbor of your roommate’s friend’s neighbor shows up for it (on paper at least). Honesty may be a virtue but attendance is a necessity. 


    • when teachers simply dont understand why we mark proxies.
  • ·        Molecular Biology errmhygawd- If nothing else, the star attraction of molecular biology (We’re still not entirely sure that this an actual subject. Research is underway) is sufficient to draw crowds of admirers to the highly philosophical, well-beloved Dr. Fridoon. Such clarity of concepts, such eloquence of narration and such importance in the world of practical medicine has never been held by any other subject in the history of mankind. “Life” is our favourite bedtime story and all of us carry copies of it in our hearts (read: phones). We adore this subject. Truly.


our usual expression in molecular biology.



And Dr. Fridoon be like..

  • ·        A Eutopia- The old auditorium itself is nothing less than paradise in the times of module. The most exotic smells (of everything from cafĂ©’s biryani to people themselves to goats), the impenetrable darkness, the distant beacon of the slideshow that holds sacred knowledge (and is zero percent visible except to a certain 6/6 indiviual) and the orchestra of 300 people breathing with a few snores mixed in, will literally take your breath away (as in, suffocate you. And nauseate you. And suffocate you some more.)


what everyone thinks we do.

what we actually do.


  • ·       INCOMING! Random books, strange faces and a whole lot of foreign words- The Newton’s law of the module system holds that:

For every single lecture, there are at least thirty slides, multiple books and a legion of visiting professors.

we second the minion.



the amount of information imparted to us defies comprehension (it LITERALLY does).The best brains from Stanford, MIT and god-knows-where-else are recruited to teach us the highly complex basics of…cells. They make a lasting impact on our minds (some students still hear whispers of WNT at 3 in the morning) and probably scar and traumatize our hippocampus for life. Teaching expertise as the world has never seen is unleashed on us in this singular hall of doom in full force like the fury of Zeus. To top it all off, the module ends with us walking the planck (read: giving a test) in which the foremost question of any significance in everyone’s mind is, “what happens I fail this?”

seems like a legit option.


Ofcourse the module system has numerous genuine benefits such as amazing clinical learning, new medical advances and interesting information, which just happened to slip my mind while writing this raging litany. Oh and I neglected to mention that we’re probably getting the best medical education in all of Pakistan too. However I shall convieniently ignore the fact, like we all do, that whoever approved this system for us was probably an intellectual genius with a vision. Rather I gleefully conclude, they just wanted to watch the world burn.



their likely expression, whoever they are. 


Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Lecture Slides: Urology; Renal cell Carcinoma

1st Year IMPORTANT TOPICS (Anatomy)

By Farkhanda QaiserOkay finally here it is. The all-important guide for the 1st year students. I’ve compiled all the prof and sendup questions of last year as well as the remnants of class tests that I had.But before you go on to read them, keep in mind the following very tested tidbits:For profs, NEVER leave any topic untouched and unread. Go through all topics so that in viva, you have atleast some idea about what the examiner is asking.NEVER lose your sendup question paper because there are high chances that some of the questions will be repeated in profs as you can see in the following example of anatomy question paper and same goes for the MCQs. Most of them are repeated. So here’s what we had done, in our facebook class group, we had made a discussion topic, and everyone told the MCQs of sendups and discussed them. Well, you may think us nerds or whatever but trust me that discussion proved very fruitful for all those who participated in it.I think enough has bin said about orga…

USMLE Step 1 Experience by Ayaz Mehmood (Score : 99/266)

USMLE Step 1 Experience by Ayaz Mehmood (Score : 99/266)
Salam everyone, let me start in the name of Allah who’s the greatest benefactor of all mankind. I am going to write a detailed composition regarding preparation for USMLE Step 1. I am a final year student at King Edward Medical University and I took my exam on June 10th. Final year is the year before internship/ house job in Pakistan. I just got my scores: 99/266



Let me introduce some myths surrounding USMLE Step 1 which are especially prevalent within Pakistan; I am not too sure about India because I heard their students typically appear in their final years.


 Myth number 1:Do not appear for USMLE Step 1 within your graduation

 Verdict: Baseless, illogical reasoning

Explanation: This is so prevalent in Pakistan it’s almost pathetic. One of the biggest concerns surrounding our students is that Step 1 is a huge risk to be taken before graduation. Let me put it in another way: Step1 would always remain a risk whenever it is taken, …