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Recollection of a Kemcolian pixie


 By Unsa Athar  

printed on 12th june, 2015.


Seeing my name in the KEMU list ... viola! I did it! It was a kaleidoscope of exciting memories and emotions...

Happiness...ecstasy.... Feeling excited for the interview...butterflies in my tummy...

6th December... Waking up... Getting all togged up...

Sitting in the cold lecture hall... Excited parents... Chattering students...

And then the drama begins...*Drum roll*

Medical examination. Documents’ submission.  Former was fun. Latter was a tragedy.

13th December 2012 ... entering the gates of the most prestigious institution in the country. Entering the auditorium, and that is where it all started. Listening to the VC, taking that oath, and the group photo session was pretty cool. The best part was getting the forms for Shahbaz Shareef’s laptop forms.

And then we were told to go to the physiology department. Scared freshmen walking in groups and seniors eyeing us with nasty smiles, sneering at us and pointing. We were

escorted to the anatomy block after it, and then to biochemistry lecture and the physiology tutorial.

Getting caught by seniors, ragged, deprived of a hundred rupee note, some were asked to do the “Gangnam style” and adaab, and to wear jackets the wrong side out, etc., meanings things that cannot be mentioned in a write-up. And I had no idea what was happening with the hostel residents. My sympathies!

Not knowing at all what to do and where to go, we spent a lot of time taking pictures of the numerous notices. And the heavy rain!

These were the highlights of 26th November to 15th December 2012 for our batch. It was a roller coaster ride. The most exciting days of that year. Everything seemed very annoying at that time but now I sit and think it was helluva fun.

Here is an overview of what I observed about KEMU during those golden days.

The best thing about KEMU: The white domes of “Patiala” block that always give an inspiration.

The worst thing about KEMU: The far-far-away departments from the main gate, to make you drown in the heavy rain at chutti time.

The most annoying thing during a lecture: Those slides that are shown in physiology lecture which are nearly impossible to read.

The most amusing thing during a lecture: when the teacher calls you Dr. Saaaab.

The thing that excites and depresses a freshman at the same time: Dead Bodies!

The thing common in all the teachers: The way they scare you by telling you will certainly fail a test if you don’t do this and that.

The thing that makes every one go “AAAHHHHHHH”: The different methodologies of taking attendance.

A secret of KEMU for freshmen: The little street near the Piccadilly café that will take you outside the university premises.

One thing that you should know before coming here: Most of the things go here on the formula “Apni madad aap.”

One thing that you should not know before coming here: It’s history! Because you will have to listen to it again and again at different times and hence, you will soon learn it by heart. So, no need to know it beforehand.

Not to be trusted: some of the seniors and pigeons!

To be trusted: your own common sense.

The secret to digest the new environment: just keep on reminding yourself you are the Cream of the cream.

Waiting anxiously for more of the KEMU ‘ishtyle’ lifestyle?

Walks to remember...

The Silent trees...the foggy buildings...

The moist grounds...the fallen leaves...

The initial days at KEMU were not as good as I expected, but with the passage of time I am falling in love with the university! (Nai, wo wala love nai) The history of KE is reflected in each and every wall of the university. Every pigeon that does “guttar goo guttar goo” seems to be saying “Welcome, Doctor Saab”. Seeing the freshmen getting ragged in some really odd ways hurts, but I pray that the seniors spare them soon so that they may also enjoy Kemlife. The last week in KE before the winter hols is always amazing! The long walks from cafe to Patiala block, sitting under the sun in front of a white building, going to Al-Kareem and still not getting an ice-cream, strolling in the Kitab Mela aimlessly, going to Union, coming back and then being dragged to Union again by friends for not bringing notes for them, trying to understand what physiology is actually about, dissecting a cadaver for the first time, feeling the presence of formalin in the food afterwards have been some of the highlights of the previous week. The best thing about the week has been “The first international burn symposium.” Yes, we were forced to be there because of the attendance drama, but seriously we loved being there, listening to the words of wisdom by some remarkable people. I do not know about every one else but this symposium made me feel proud of being a future doctor (Insha’Allah) and a Kemcolian! Thank you Dr.Farid, Dr.Ashuk Gupta and Dr. Jawad as your influential words made me vow that I’ll give all I have to create a difference and help the masses in pain.

And Dear KEMU, yes you are not as perfect as I dreamt you to be; you have management issues, your people consider freshmen *Censored* , your teaching methodologies are at times incomprehensible, but I admit that wearing my overall, when I walk around in your blocks, I feel proud to be a Kemcolian. I know I’ll have to burn the midnight oil to survive but still, I love being a doctor. I love being a Kemcolian.

Random things I learnt from school and college that helped me in university

When you are done with your assignment, you always find a better way to do it.

When you finally get the opportunity to go and buy all the stuff your teacher told you to, she/he will remember another one the very next day. And that too a thing very important!

It’s no use telling your friend you have prepared for tomorrow’s test or saying aik lafz nai parha. They will never believe it. Just say “woi haalat hai jo sab ki hoti hai”.

If you are the famous one in your class, be mentally prepared to hear some weird (really weird) rumours about yourself.

Giving explanations to everyone will not kill the rumour. Saying just a “Whatever” will produce better results.

If you once bring a frog for school dissection, you will always be expected to ‘produce’ frogs for every dissection that follows. So do not volunteer to bring a cadaver for dissection in medical college!

Each and every co-curricular and extra-curricular activity is not made for you. You have one head, two arms and two legs. So go for five at the max.!

People come and go. Getting too emotionally attached to a friend is not a good idea. Just be good and true to everyone and you shall make friends for life!

If you do not understand administration’s politics, stay away from them.

Making notes in writing legible only to you has its benefits. People don’t ask for your registers. So you are saved from the tension of begging people to give back your notes.

If a teacher asks a question with a who-dares-to-answer-it expression, keep the answer to yourself.

If a teacher asks a question with a lets-see-who-answers-it expression; make sure you answer the question.

Just being the monitor/CR/GR will not impress your teachers. Fulfilling your duties as one will do that.

Laughing at someone’s stupid blunder in class will make them laugh harder at yours.

If you cannot understand how people who seemed to have the worst preparation score the highest, try studying all night and acting as cool as someone who never touched a book.

The day before the test, watching TV is better than lying all day and night with an open book in hand when you know your brain won’t let you study.

Having a tough time at the school/college/university does not mean you have to look like Severus Snape in the HP movies every time.

Eating and dressing up well shall make you feel better” was what my Bio’s professor told me.
Yes, you have studied that your brain has many compartments. But that doesn’t mean you have to think about everything simultaneously. I think that’s what Einstein did and look what happened to his hair!

If you are having study issues and don’t want to listen to your friends’ haaaeyyy mera haal tou is say bhy bura hai , your siblings’ouuufooohh and your mother’s aww mera bachaaa, talk to your stuffed toy. Its constant facial expression shall do wonders.

If you want your parents to believe you are studying spread out all the books on the bed. Having one book out at a time does not give the impact.

Never wear a new dress to the chemistry lab. I once dropped KMNO4 on mine and what I found next day were random holes here and there in it!

You always have someone in the class who is better than you. If not this year, next year shall bring such a person. So never have the superiority complex.

You might be a big fish in a little pond Doesn’t mean you’ve won ‘Cause along may come a bigger one and you’ll be lost...^ (Coldplay-Lost)

If someone asks you your detailed marks and then your roll number, never give it to them. That will make them believe you lied. Good for them!

And so much more!


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