I jotted down the following paragraphs in a fit of frank confession when I was in First year.First year's ( thankfully) over now,but I think that some new first year students will be able to "connect" with what I've said in this blog post :)
THE POST IS DEDICATED TO ALL FIRST YEAR STUDENTS !
I sometimes think that some unseen force shreds up all my days
in some giant,invisible shredder hanging somewhere in a blackhole
in the cosmos-and then sends me back the shreds,the dregs,the
cut-up crass so I've got something to mull over as I drift off to
It's a far-fetched idea...But then desperate times invariably
bring forth desperate thoughts (Desperate measures too,But that
doesn't really apply here.I wouldn't be writing this soaked
soliloquy otherwise.I would be studying.)
So what's my problem?Well-I can't fit in the study routine
required from me by KEMU!I was good enough to get here...But I've
mutated since I came here!I'm just not the good student I once
was.And I know,I whine a lot....So every day I promise to
study,and every day I end up not doing so.
What happened to me when I passed through the arches of
KEMU? I didn't come here with the feeling that I'd become a part
of the awe-inspiring legions of the ubiquitous"Kings and Queens"
Pakistan couldn't do without(Okay..too many adjectives in this
sentence.But I can't curb my "instincts" when it comes to
adjectives).I had no illusions about making it "Big" at KE.Not
for me to prance in an overcoat and carry about the insigna of
KEMU as a passport to better places.
I just wanted to GET into KE.That I DID.I had never thought
about the things which would ultimately get rolling once I'd
entered into KEMU.
During F.Sc -Swotting up before the exams-the only thing
which kept me going was the mini-movie I'd conjured up and saved
in my mind to "hypnotise" me into swotting even more:
The one featuring me and my friends pirouetting all over KE on
our first day,cracking our fingers to an euphoria-inducing
war-song of"WE GOT IN! WE GOT IN!".There was a programmed
choreography to it all,one group entering the parking lot from
the north,one from the south-all assembling to bang our feet to
the plaintive drone of "WE GOT IN".It was unrealistic,but it got
me through the times that still make me shudder.
If anything,blessed am I to be finally out of the clutches
of F.Sc.And blessed am I ,too,to get a place in KEMU.It's a
miracle which has got me here,and I cannot thank Allah for all
the ways He has helped me.
Those barbaric powers-that-be which control our examination
system make sure your body-juices get all dried up as you
traverse the heaving seas of F.Sc.And No,I'm not ranting in some
POST-F.Sc hangover....The memories of that horrible hell-hole
just got some old wounds pricking.How melodramatic I'm
getting.Forgive me.It wasn't ALL that bad as that.I'm complaining
too much.It's all a part of being an inconsolable bundle of
All I'm trying to say is-I wasn't prepared to deal with the
post-admission life.The life that awaits you once you get into
KEMU.Ofcourse,coming from a family where MBBS might as be the
standard degree for all forms female,I was subjected to
orientation lectures at the dining table,in the car,in the
I was told that the first two months would drop like a
bombshell- That The substages were hungry for blood.That the
Stages were were desperate drug-lords out for a kill.And the
send-ups?Merely ice-cold warriors who'd love to scalp you at the
fist opportunity.How did I take all this?With a pinch of salt.I
was too excited to worry about substages.And I was full of "The
blind optimism of youth".
When I gave that first module of mine,I knew that KEMU is just
a "code" word.
A code word for a cult organization here to drive you nuts
till you enter their throng as "Dewormed doctors"(All happiness
sucked out).I knew that KEMU stands for "Keratinised exoskeletons
mauling undergraduates".Atleast,that was the impression I got
after my first tutorial viva.
I respect my teachers with all my heart.I just couldn't
resist putting together the above-mentioned acrimonious anagram!
It's all in a good sense.No offence.And I'm scared too,of the
Gustapo,the Swatzi,the secret nazi police....what if my anagram
of KEMU reaches the ears of some professor.I would be mummified
Still,I'm alive and that's a consolation.Atleast I'm not a
rebel sweltering in a jungle in Srilanka ,or some kid starving
in Africa.And one thing-I salute all those people in my class who
study like hell.First year is like that-either study or become a total
procrastinator like me :)
PS: I AM still alive (and kickin').First year may seem hard sometimes...but trust me,it's one roller coaster ride with a lot of laughs in between!
It's really up to you to decide how you swallow this pill- grinning or groaning?
My Advice: Just plaster a grin on your face .Atleast it'll drive people NUTS wondering what you're so happy about :)