Hostelites vs day-scholars!!!

Hostelites vs day-scholars!!!

-Lubaba Mukhtar, 1st year

When I’m sitting at home (on the weekend) and writing about this hostelites vs day-scholars’ (who’s at more advantage) topic, its really easy to be biased towards the day-scholars and their homely comforts. In the university hours, when the two teams “hostelites and day-scholars” come anywhere near each other: the scenes, the dialogues exchanged and the looks thrown at each other are definitely worth a million bucks of entertainment. :D

                   HOSTEL BIRTHDAY PARTIES:
Scene 1: a group of hostelites slumbering (the usual behavior of most hostelites) on the bench right in front of where a bunch of day-scholars are already sitting (that’s what most day scholars do) in the lecture theatre.
1st girl: oh God yar, couldn’t study anatomy at all, the birthday party of “a certain girl” in the nearby room took up all the evening! It was so much fun by the way, I mean we don’t even know them that well, but still it was so sweet of them to invite us over; such a delicious cake they had ordered! J
2nd girl: (yawning) yup, I am so sleepy after the late night shugal, but these parties are gonna keep popping up, another birthday’s coming next week, it’s gonna be super dooper fun.

                               THE EXAGGERATED STORY...

(a day-scholar behind them with a Laiq Hussain histology in her hand feels so strongly like asking them to keep their loud speakers in control but masters the urge and goes on studying, while trying hard to keep her thoughts away from the party being discussed, but, alas, all in vain!) ;-)

A party was definitely going on in the nearby room, but there was no invitation, no cake, and no shughal, just:

                Apni room mate ki birthday to bohat dooor hai :(

                       Chawal log, invite nai kar skte thay....

The homely comforts:
Scene 2: A hostelite standing bored near a cadaver in the D.H, suddenly the sound of an interesting story is carried to her by “of course the vibrations of particles in the air” (she wasn’t eavesdropping at all!). And ta daaa, the story goes:
1st day-scholar: buddy, I’m so glad I’m not a hostelite, I mean I can’t imagine how I would’ve survived. You can totally relate to what I mean, right? We get home, mum’s already laid the table and we only have to wash up and sit down comfortably with no worries of rushing to the mess. And we even have the solace and satisfaction of eating the best food in the world “mum made food”
  2nd day scholar: yeah, you’re right! Poor hostelites, it’s kind of tough to serve your own self every day.

                        Oh yeah! I’m a mummy's baby!
And the hostelite near them feels like stuffing something into their mouths…

Friends’ together means fun…
Another very familiar story heard by the day-scholars to make them pity themselves is when the hostelites talk of the various ways in which they had fun together. When day-scholars are stuck at home with their boring, old; or irritating little siblings, the hostelites have the advantage of the always available, entertaining company of their age-fellows.
                                 Life's good with friends...

And the day scholars:
Sitting at home alone in a snit, getting bored to death by the monotonous routine!!

Why the hell is life so boriiiing????

Actually the same friends with whom we’re stuck 24/7 are not always that fun to be with. When a person is desperate to have some quiet and peace, it’s very much possible that the other person’s in a total mood of fiasco. Then the mutual feelings are not always that amicable…

          Can u pleaaase staple your beak for just five minutes????
And no matter how much a hostelite pretends that she doesn’t miss her maaika (home) in her sasuraal (hostel), there is definitely the saas (hostel food) and nand (homesickness) to stimulate tear glands sometimes…

                 talking on the phone with family...

Group study (a blessing or curse??):
Aaaaah, the famous words of every senior to any freshmen hostelite: “bachoooo, mil beth ke parhai karo, asaani ho jae gi!” Like seriously? Are we gonna study the drab and dreary biochemistry (the colorless lipids, the odorless proteins, the tasteless carbohydrates) together, but really; “gross” anatomy is much more palatable when studied together!

                nothing's that boring when we do it together...
And the bone crushing, heart palpitating, depressing, maddening and never ending course of M.B.B.S is made a lot easier when shared….when its burden has to be carried alone then we look more like:

Such good exercise for my almost non-existent biceps and triceps...

And studying alone is more like singing the most melodious lullaby to yourself…

Hostel spying bureau (HSB):
It’s a special agency founded by the girls of the hostel (sometimes day scholars also enroll themselves in this agency for training). The basic aim of this agency are:

1)    Spying on every girl possible within a 50 room radius.
2)    Finding out every possible book that a nearby or even a faraway girl is studying.
3)    Always lying about what and how much you have studied.
4)    Never believing what the other person tells about their studies.
TEST: If you want to check whether anyone is a member of this intelligence agency then check if they say the following things everywhere (from the washroom to the mess-room)
1-kitna parh liya hai?
2-kon konsi books use kar rai ho for _ _ subject?
3- me ne to kuch nai parha yar, bs time hi nai mila, shughal laga rahe thay sara din…
4- test kaisa hua?
5- substage me kitnay marks hain?
There are certain other identifying characters of this agency’s members but my research is not yet so extensive, I’ll try to become a member and keep everyone updated with this important information.
The members may look like any of these:
                         when spying in the corridors….

          when spying in the lawns...

      when spying on the neighbours...

Running after the bus…
All the day scholars can pretend that they get up from a much more comfortable bed and come from much more desirable abode than hostelites but hostelites do not have to run after their buses when they are running late; they only have to walk down the shortest distance possible from their hostels to the lecture theatres, now that’s a big advantage, right?

And so, the files of this case are closed without any conclusion, no judge can decide this case, no lawyer can win the case for any one side. It was, is and will remain an unresolved case unless and until all hostels are demolished. :D


  1. Ah the inevitable dorm vs home debate! Does it ever end?!
    Still for me,leaving home was this big "coming of age " thing. As the testament says,adulthood is all about giving up childish things and in my case,giving up all the comforts of home was the ultimate ushering into the world of adults!
    Living on my own has taught me so much that I would never have learnt with in the confines of my home. I go to late night gatherings,attend all sorts of literary events,go to all of my favorite book shops and spend as much as I want on books,clothes and fast food.
    All this would have been completely unacceptable to my rather conservative family. Dorm has made a different man of me. And I so love the cultural scene in Lahore!
    So yes,I have no regrets about leaving home( expect perhaps the sole fact that I miss my mom terribly, but hey,you cant spend your entire life sitting in mama's lap!)

  2. exams ki preparation kasai karunnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn?


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