People of KE

 - Same Guy

Artwork courtesy of Bilal Rehman

"Are you watching closely?"

Remember this from The Prestige? If you do, you should have watched closely henceforth and hitherto. You people must have shared memes about how you are a kind of person who notices everything but stays quite - because there is a trend around where everyone just loves to say that they are introverts, maybe because being called an introvert also entails that they must be some extraordinary talented super-duper-outta-this-world genius dudes whose hidden gifts aren't being expressed owing to their shyness and maturity that do not allow them to show off. Coming back, if you were watching closely, you must have noticed quite a few things about yourself and people around you, here in this home of yours.

KE is different from other universities, medical or non medical in many aspects. First off, its phenomenal people. They are the most talented and gifted people of the whole country. About academics, other institutions  have those people who possess a good memory and are very good at studies also but KE is home to some special people, creme de la creme, the chosen ones. KE undoubtedly produces the best doctors - also the greatest number of graduates who pass MLE test. Kemcolians' brains are distinctly distinguished from the common folk. Some of them have such a strong Ratta power that they can reproduce anything they crammed even once in their life. Some of them would digest Guyton in merely the first read. After all, they are board toppers. No room for debate about how brainy they are.!
~my love, my drive, it came from KE (not pain)
Only thing to argue over is their extra-curricular life. Let me tell you again that it is beyond doubt that these people are the most creative, imaginative and talented people in the whole country. There are excellent artists, skillful writers, prolific readers, expert singers, eloquent debators, photographers, thinkers, humorists, good analysts and whatever catagory of talent you can imagine. And then there are these jack-of-all-trades. They would master in everything they plunge into. Now you would say, these people can be found in every institution. How is KE specialFirst thing, in other institutions there are only SOME people that have a discernable talent. But in KE, EVERY single soul is a talented one. Second, there is something special to their talents that makes them superior to all the others and that can't be explained in words but can be felt evidently. I mean, why are kemcolians the strongest candidates in any quiz competetion, despite the fact that they don't have anytime to read those extremely-dry-impossible-to-remember Gohar GK books - and they don't! Why do they have the best debators in the circuit, the best singers (Aida Shehzad, Ubaid Ali Rana, Saad ur Rehman - who are no less than the professionals), the best writers (so many, some of them who write in the national magazines and others simply on their timelines like that new-in-town fb page admin who's obsessed with bananas), the deft filmmakers winning awards at every other competetion? KE also has a reputation not only for the most handsome and gorgeous models (examples would be too controversial) but being the most conservative educational institution in, atleast, Punjab also. I could quote many examples, but I think, the point has been made. (No need to mention actors here, because they fall in the category of jack of all trades. They are the best progeny KE can offer).

I am your worst nightmare..!
 Now all these people have been congregated here - intricately hand-picked by the most elaborate system of selection - in this concentration camp to be slowly gassed out by the Nazi-style strenous studies, except the fact that they came here with there own consent. Hell, they worked their asses off like the George Orwell's Boxer(the horse) to be here, all their lives day in day out.

Did you miss me?
 Prior to my admission here, I   had a notion that these people   at KE must be some real   life Sherlock Holmes always   competing as to who can make more deductions, or Sheldon   Cooopers strolling around   making startling discoveries in the quantum theory of   electrodynamics, or Socrates always mulling over the   labyrinthine Euthyphro problem of morality,   or philosophers contemplating on how Pascal's wager can settle the issue of theism and athiesm permanently and political   analysts discussing how the page blah article blah class blah of   the constitution shows that judiciary is working perfectly in the   public interest and no lines have been crossed.

 But it was about time that I was utterly dissappointed. Life is   sad guys, and expectations almost invariably bring disappointments. In fact, both are the same thing having different names due to difference of timeline i.e. a feeling that something will/will not happen until a given point of time is called expectation - and the feeling that something won't happen now/has happened after/at the given point of time is called disappointment.

It's like femoral and popliteal arteries. Same vessel but different names at different locations.


Dr. Asfand
So, instead of Patras and Yusufi kind of people that I was hoping to meet here, all I got were these air coolers type of people who would make the climate very cold whenever they tried to be funny, therefore serving as potential assets against fighting the rising issue of global warming. In place of Umaira Ahmad's  Salaar and Dr. Asfand from Yaqeen Ka Safar, I only came about Nasir Khan Jans and Nouman Khans. Expectations were that I would be sitting in Pak Tea House with a clique of the literary people like that of Shahab, Mufti Mumtaz, Ashfaq Ahmad Bano Qudsia and Ibn e Insha, but what I find out merely were these THEETAS whose lives revolved around the 3S' principle i.e. Study, Sleep and Supper and the members of various clandestine covens, always at war with each other.

As far as I am concerned, I don't have much skills besides overthinking and sleeping a lot. I don't know how I ended up here, but let us not discuss determinism here.

To be Continued.


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